ATTACHMENT & CONSCIOUSNESS
We often confuse attachment with love.
Attachment is the feeling we obtain from emotional contact with events, things and people. We will only take action should we be able to guarantee a certain conclusion. We do this to protect our inner world from feelings of vulnerability and hurt. Some attachments slow our development: we get caught in the need to control our own process rather than allow our destiny path to open in the direction that’s the most productive for us.
Michelle’s Hollywood look on love meant she never got a star part
Michelle had been in a relationship with Mike for a number of years.
Having gone through a divorce, Michelle was keen to remarry, mainly because she wanted to have a family and could see the opportunity beginning to drift away.
When Mike asked her to marry him at Christmas she was delighted to accept. But after a few months of accepting Mike’s marriage proposal, Michelle decided he was not the one.
Now alone and single Michelle began to obsess over finding the man for her. She found it very difficult tostay at home, and always had to be out, just in case she should bump into her ideal partner. Her compulsion to visit psychics continued to increase until it also became an obsession. By the time she sat down in front of me she had visited numerous Tarot readers, searching for answers as to when she would meet her Mr Right. Her many readings led her to believe she would soon meet her perfect man but he had still not appeared. Her first and only question for me was around her search for the ideal partner.
When I looked at Michelle’s energy it wanted to talk about her past relationships rather than go forward searching for her future. When I mentioned this to Michelle she started to insist on looking at the energy for her future relationships.
“Sorry Michelle but that just isn’t going to happen,” I said. “Before you look at the future, your energy is insisting you heal the past. Without that you will not have a successful relationship. Every man you have met so far has either not lived up to expectations or has reminded you too much of your ex-husband.”
Michelle burst into tears. She had spent a long time making herself thinner to feel more attractive to possible partners. However, either every new man she met did indeed remind her of her ex-husband or the potential wouldn’t realise, for some other reason.
In my view, she appeared too desperate. Her neediness and apparent desire to be attractive to all who met her was deeply rooted in her insecurities and lack of self-esteem.
“Let’s have a look at the energy of your ex-husband,” I said.
As I looked into the trapped energy in her system around relationships, it became clear her past was dictating her present. We worked on moving her attachments to certain outcomes. Her “Hollywood” view of relationships had come from her childhood ideal. However, in the real world her experience was different. It seemed no man could emotionally satisfy her deep insecurities and therefore she was continually disappointed.
Letting go of her attachments proved rather challenging for Michelle. She was convinced it also meant letting go of any opportunities for romance. Her inner world had become used to licking its wounds and nursing the hurts, so actually preparing her system to allow life to flow was rather difficult for her.
Eventually she managed it.
I asked her; “Do you need a relationship in order to enjoy your life now?” Her answer came back, “No!” My next question was, “Do you still need to keep searching?” Again it was a no.
Michelle sat there looking perplexed. “So it happened just like that? It feels strange, I’m trying to find those feelings again but I can’t. I sort of feel nothing. Well, not ‘nothing’ – I would say I feel neutral. It’s fine if I meet someone, but it’s also fine if I don’t.”
By releasing her attachments to particular outcomes, Michelle was able to open her life up again to living rather than existing.
ATTACHMENT AND COLLECTIVE UNCONSCIOUS
This attachment to the physical world, which you accept at birth, is your prominent challenge through your lifetime. Your spiritual goal is to step over it. Eventually there is the realisation that in order to become part of a higher consciousness you have to leave where you are in life right now, and bound forward into the unknown. That’s why the path of the Sensitive can feel lonely: as you move away from your old energy there is a sense of loss. As you take the step forward, your perceptions of who you are and what the world is to you, begin to expand and gradually you start to accept your higher frequencies and vibration.
As you lose your attachments, your consciousness expands to ‘see’ the deeper aspects of the self. You become more sensitive to the subtlety of energies around you. You find you can use your feelings to guide you successfully through life.
As you move into a situation, push your feelings in there first. Ask yourself some questions:
- How does it feel?
- What is the Universe communicating?
- Which area flows for you, which does not?
You may not be able to see the subtle energies around you, but increasingly your perception of them through your heightened senses allows you to perceive them. Before you know it, the Universe is popping things up in front of you. Events in your life gather pace and energy and you begin to feel them weeks – even years – before they arrive in your physical world.
THE RELEASE OF ATTACHMENTS
Generally, for most Sensitives the path of the release of attachments happens whether you like it or not. Relationships change, the old energies that suggest you are attached to certain outcomes push to the surface to expose old wounds. This is not a punishment, or a mass of karmic debt: it is the release of tribal patterns entrenched through inherited beliefs and collective social perceptions.
Most Sensitives begin to find themselves suspended on the fringe of their physical world, existing in some sort of dream state. This is the transition from worrying about what others think, and seeing yourself only through their eyes, and moving into your own world and vibration.
Releasing old attachments is a hugely freeing experience for the psyche as we enter the vibrational world of our deeper senses.
Michelle joined one of my classes. After a short while she began to settle into enjoying her life ‘as it is’ rather than how it ‘should be’. She consistently worked on adjusting her attachments, and her desire for fixed outcomes. As she began to do this she allowed herself to become a woman free of the constraints of worrying about what others think of her. During this transitional phase she allowed herself to laugh again properly. Perhaps for the first time in her life she found herself relaxing and began to look forward to the simplicities of life.
Before long, Michelle was describing a man she had met. She used the magic words I had hoped she would one day say to me: “Heidi, it’s strange: he’s not my usual type . . !”
EXERCISE
Discover your attachments
Ask yourself the following questions. Wait for the answers: let your energy talk, not your head.
- What in your life are you desperate to change?
- Who do you need in your life to be different?
- Why? What behaviour do you want from them?
Sense your reactions in your system.
Now, imagine holding all that tension in your hand. Imagine your hand tightening around a pencil in your palm. The pencil represents your attachments. Let your hand clamp around the imaginary pencil. This is how you hold on to things.
After a while your hand will ache as holding the pencil that tight becomes hard work. Keep tightening your grip – this is the pressure that builds before a release.
And now, in your mind, release your fist and allow the pencil to drop to the floor – let it go.
Feel the tension drop with it.
PART 2: ‘Attachment & Consciousness’ Meditation
When you have read the article above you are ready to complete the easy to do meditation
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People who watched & listened to this episode also watched these
Series 2 – Finding Where You Fit In – The Secret To Belonging
Series 3 – Becoming Unafraid of Sensual Power & Attraction
Series 4 – Creating Your Own Values
