Anxiety Release Method – ‘The Pencil’
Most of us hold on to things very tightly in our lives. We hold on to what we know; the people we know, and the situations that are familiar. This is a normal trait within human behaviour
Karen is in a relationship with Phil they have been together for many years. Both have previously been in long-term relationships too and have children from those marriages. Phil is not an easy person for Karen to live with. Even before he lost his job he was already pretty challenging. Instead of talking something through, their discussions would end up in full blown arguments because he would never discuss anything. His answer to a disagreement would be for him to go off to the spare room with a book and ignore Karen whilst she would be on the phone trying to sort out child visiting arrangements with his ex-wife because he wouldn’t do it himself.
When Phil had lost his job he was out of work for over two years. Karen was busy working full-time to make sure there was enough money coming in to keep everything going. During that time, Karen would ask Phil to do some of the household chores, especially as he was at home all day. When she would return home from work, he would be on the computer typing away chatting to friends – exactly where he had been when she had left for work in the morning.
He would be surrounded by washing, shrunken clothes, (where he had cooked them in the tumble dryer) dirty dishes, and full rubbish sacks which hadn’t quite made it to the wheelie bin outside. When Karen would complain, he would look at her with horror that she should be so cross at the mess he was creating. She saw all of his behaviour as hugely disrespectful, especially as she had made it clear on countless occasions that he needed to help as he was at home twenty-four hours a day.
Driven to the edge
The situation drove Karen to the verge of a nervous break-down. There was no getting through to Phil or making any difference to his behaviour whatsoever. After a year of it, she found herself going to the doctor to be prescribed medication to help calm her nerves. Everyone around Karen was asking the obvious question as to why she was staying with him if she was so unhappy with the situation.
We all have the habit of staying with a situation rather than changing the obvious. To everyone else it was obvious Karen’s situation needed changing: ‘Why don’t you talk to him about it?’ Was the obvious question, or: ‘Why don’t you ask him to leave if he refuses to adjust?’ Her excuses extended from worrying about being on her own to worrying about Phil and how he would cope on his own. The fact of the matter was that he was a man she couldn’t change. In her mind, if he didn’t change then it meant she was a failure, so best to live in ‘hope’ of a change rather than deal with the reality.
How the Pencil works
The Pencil is a powerful yet simple meditation to perfect lasting change when we are faced in life with a situation that entices the same, or similar emotional reaction Karen was experiencing. The effort required to hold on to something tightly is enormous yet we are all guilty of doing this. We hold onto what we know as if it were life itself. We hold onto the familiarity of it even though it’s incredibly uncomfortable or unsuitable.
This is how people get caught in addictions, repetitive behaviours, and patterns.
‘The Pencil’ is a simple method of release. Within the psyche, pressure is created during this meditation process so you realise just how much effort is required to keep life changes and improvements at bay. Through the meditation, with a very simple movement within the mind’s eye, the pressure is dropped and released.
We walk around clutching a pencil
Metaphorically we wander around in life holding a pencil as tightly as we possibly can in a clenched fist. As you can imagine, after a while your hand will become tired and weary from holding on so tightly.
Soon the only focus you have, the only thing you can see in life, is the pencil you’re clutching. Your fist begins to ache, you’re worn out from the concentration required to hold the pencil and it’s the only thing you talk about to others in your life, or you sit and suffer in silence. More often than not, you compare things with your friends and family or the person you meet on the street and ponder how uncomfortable it is to be clutching the pencil.
Karen’s pencil was her partner Phil. He wouldn’t do what she wanted or even hear what she wanted. Every time she awoke each morning she was reminded of how tightly she was holding the pencil until the pain was such she required medication for it.
Karen would compare notes with other people who were holding pencils like Phil, or she would avoid the situation altogether pretending the tightly held object didn’t exist. When we do this we become defensive and unapproachable, the concentration required for the pencil has increased to the extent that we become snappy if our attention is diverted towards it. If friends and family try and tell us the pencil is turning our hand blue, we behave as if don’t want to know. It becomes a case of: ‘Yes, thank you, I know my hand is turning blue, but I don’t want to deal with it and am going to continue to hold it, for now at least.’
Dropping the pencil
To release the pencil from the palm of your hand is a surprisingly simple task. It isn’t something we readily do or even know how to do. The process for releasing the pencil is the meditation process which accompanies this session. When we realise what it is we are holding tightly we can consciously choose to let it go. Letting the pencil drop from our palm doesn’t mean the person or the situation goes away, it means it is free to breathe and choose its own way. The tension from your whole system is released. You have two hands free for starters and with two hands free you can more clearly see your way forward or at least grasp at the things you want because your mindset is free enough to receive.
This is the key to your intuitive and spiritual progress, especially as an Intuitive Sensitive person. If you have one hand busy gripping a pencil, your focus is one dimensional as it only has one direction. Everything is essentially focussed around gripping the pencil rather than seeing the larger picture is through your intuitive instincts. When you drop the pencil you can see clearly! Your mind isn’t directed towards the growing pain in your fist.
Now follow the process for discovering and dropping your pencil.
“What we see depends mainly on what we look for.”
PART 2: ‘The Pencil’ Meditation – Releasing Disappointment
When you have read the article above you are ready to complete the easy to do meditation
PART 3: Ok now you have read the article and listened to the meditation it is time for you to discus either/both inside the free Facebook Group which you can join here:
PART 4: Are you ready to go deeper, much deeper? If you liked this episode of the Ignite Your Intuition show you will love the Authentic Soul Membership Programme. Upgrade here:
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