Why You Won't Fit In

Why You Won't Fit In

You’re better off working on your own - right? You believe the only person you can trust is yourself. You’re suspicious of offers of help and prefer to be the super-helpful person. But, at the same time, you would love for someone to notice your needs, to notice what you need without your having to spell it out. The question is why is it you can spot what someone else needs but no one can spot it for you?

Audio Only Version of the Video Above:

What if the problem is you can't trust 'teamwork' because you've been dominated? The issue is you feel defensive and rebel. The solution is to have rejection in perspective.

During this 30 minute session you will learn:

  • Why 'Teamwork' Irritates You
  • What You Fear
  • How You Really Fit

​Please do your best to watch/listen to each part in order.

You’re better off working on your own - right? You believe the only person you can trust is yourself. You’re suspicious of offers of help and prefer to be the super-helpful person.

But, at the same time, you would love for someone to notice your needs, to notice what you need without your having to spell it out.

The question is

why is it you can spot what someone else needs

but no one can spot it for you?

In this episode we are resolving:

Why You Won’t Fit In

You’ll discover:

  • Why teamwork irritates you
  • What you fear
  • How you really fit

First,  you need to recognise why you rebel when it comes to fitting in.

You rebel because fitting in feels small:  it feels as though you’re trying to squeeze into a small space but you feel you’re awkwardly wandering with an arm hanging out.

Why?  Because the ‘arm’ is your unconscious means of escape. Your ‘arm’ is rebellion.  If you’ve got an arm hanging out you can lever your way out. 

This is why you were the child who wouldn’t really comply, even when you were the ‘good’ one.

It’s the reason why you’re the one who always did something ‘different’.

You’re the one working on your inner world – no one else around you is doing this.

You’re fine with people, you like people - you help people all the time.

So why does teamwork irritate you?

Teamwork irritates you because if you’ve been dominated it’s hard to trust other people.

If you’ve spent a part of your life without the freedom of your own choices or you’ve grown up in a life full of harsh rules you were afraid to break you will assume if you don’t agree with the team you’ll be rejected – and that all teams are unfriendly and you’ve felt you’re better off alone.

As a result, you will unconsciously lean towards unfriendly scenarios or people will assume you’re aloof when you’re really not.

Think of that for a moment – the times you’ve felt subtly excluded, even though perhaps the people involved were not actively excluding you.  

What’s the real fear?

The real fear is that if you include yourself you’ll relax and then either domination will creep up on you or you’ll be included but then later suddenly dropped.

You feel this, even if such thoughts are not borne out by your experience, so you stay around situations where you don’t feel you really fit.

So how do you get beyond the belief you’re better off alone?

You do so by dealing with the fear of potential domination, the times in the past when you have felt rejected for not wanting to be compliant; the times you have felt hurt that your individuality hasn’t been noticed, let alone accepted.

So how do you really fit?

The key is to accept some people only feel safe around those they can rule over.

What I got sucked into for a long time was thinking I had to fit in, and be ruled over

You end up feeling you’re always trying to escape.

That doesn’t work, because those who would happily include you think you don’t want to be there.

So what are 3 little things you can do to feel you can choose where you fit?

  1. Accept some people don’t expect anything from you. There are people who genuinely like you and expect nothing.
  2. Accept those who dominate are ruled by their insecurity. You assume those who dominate know more than you. They don’t: they operate from fear.
  3. Spot what’s triggered your aloofness. Because the more you do this, the quicker you’ll find where you fit.
Part 2:
Accompanying Meditation

Resolving Rejection Meditation

Give the Soul Directed Relationships Meditation a go, even if you’ve never done meditation before – just follow the words.

Complete The Meditation Now
Resolving Rejection Meditation
Part 2:
Accompanying Episode

Resolving Rejection Meditation

You’re better off working on your own - right? You believe the only person you can trust is yourself. You’re suspicious of offers of help and prefer to be the super-helpful person. But, at the same time, you would love for someone to notice your needs, to notice what you need without your having to spell it out. The question is why is it you can spot what someone else needs but no one can spot it for you?

Watch The Episode Now
Resolving Rejection Meditation
Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Orphan Archetype Workshop

When the Orphan energy is active, you wait for the rescue that never happened, you feel lost, don’t know where you fit in, you settle for less than you want and you desperately want to go ‘home’ but you don’t know where home is.

The Orphan energy chooses you to create the ultimate rescue, the connection to the self, beyond self-abandonment and into interdependence, the safe, secure world of true self-esteem and value.

Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Lover Archetype Workshop

When the Lover energy is active, your soul is at odds with your careful ego. You live a life switching between conquering fear, taking risks and the excitement of your consciousness expanding, followed by flopping back into the safety of what you know.

The Lover energy chooses you to connect with your personal source of power that’s not a climb for position or authority, not a power over another but real power - the power within.

Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

King Archetype Workshop

When the King energy is active, your inner world is conflicted. Each time you step into your own rules, you hear the voice of the King’s shadow – the tyrant suggesting you are less than, how you’ll never live up to expectations and the weakling ‘prince’ who doesn’t protect your new path.

The solution is to step into the energy of the true King, the matured ‘male’ energy offering centred, confident direction from deep within. The unconscious pressure to ‘fit in’ evaporates as you step into your own leadership. .

Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Queen Archetype Workshop

You’ve looked around, decided what you like, made judgements and now you’re going out on your own. Does what you want match with others or should you just become what you think they want?

This stage is answered through the process of Creating Your Own Values, by using your Queen Energy.

Heidi Sawyer is an intuition expert whose online courses, mentorship programmes and events have helped 74,498 Intuitive-Sensitive People understand their sensitivity as their greatest asset. Heidi’s business has helped more than 5,000 Intuitive-Sensitives recover from emotional-trauma, understand their intuition as their very own super-power for managing difficult people, career enhancement and better relationships. Watch Philosopher's Journey webinar replay here.

Heidi’s book, Highly Intuitive People has been a consistent best-seller since 2015 providing Intuitive-Sensitive People with the map of their life path. Heidi’s business exists because she understands the loneliness of opening to your deep world, and strove to provide the service she wanted to receive. To learn more about Heidi Sawyer click here.
Love Your Life Show

Why You Won't Fit In

You’re better off working on your own - right? You believe the only person you can trust is yourself. You’re suspicious of offers of help and prefer to be the super-helpful person. But, at the same time, you would love for someone to notice your needs, to notice what you need without your having to spell it out. The question is why is it you can spot what someone else needs but no one can spot it for you?

Get The Full Experience:

Audio Only Version of the Video Above:

What if the problem is you can't trust 'teamwork' because you've been dominated? The issue is you feel defensive and rebel. The solution is to have rejection in perspective.

During this 30 minute session you will learn:

  • Why 'Teamwork' Irritates You
  • What You Fear
  • How You Really Fit

​Please do your best to watch/listen to each part in order.

Meditation Only:

You’re better off working on your own - right? You believe the only person you can trust is yourself. You’re suspicious of offers of help and prefer to be the super-helpful person.

But, at the same time, you would love for someone to notice your needs, to notice what you need without your having to spell it out.

The question is

why is it you can spot what someone else needs

but no one can spot it for you?

In this episode we are resolving:

Why You Won’t Fit In

You’ll discover:

  • Why teamwork irritates you
  • What you fear
  • How you really fit

First,  you need to recognise why you rebel when it comes to fitting in.

You rebel because fitting in feels small:  it feels as though you’re trying to squeeze into a small space but you feel you’re awkwardly wandering with an arm hanging out.

Why?  Because the ‘arm’ is your unconscious means of escape. Your ‘arm’ is rebellion.  If you’ve got an arm hanging out you can lever your way out. 

This is why you were the child who wouldn’t really comply, even when you were the ‘good’ one.

It’s the reason why you’re the one who always did something ‘different’.

You’re the one working on your inner world – no one else around you is doing this.

You’re fine with people, you like people - you help people all the time.

So why does teamwork irritate you?

Teamwork irritates you because if you’ve been dominated it’s hard to trust other people.

If you’ve spent a part of your life without the freedom of your own choices or you’ve grown up in a life full of harsh rules you were afraid to break you will assume if you don’t agree with the team you’ll be rejected – and that all teams are unfriendly and you’ve felt you’re better off alone.

As a result, you will unconsciously lean towards unfriendly scenarios or people will assume you’re aloof when you’re really not.

Think of that for a moment – the times you’ve felt subtly excluded, even though perhaps the people involved were not actively excluding you.  

What’s the real fear?

The real fear is that if you include yourself you’ll relax and then either domination will creep up on you or you’ll be included but then later suddenly dropped.

You feel this, even if such thoughts are not borne out by your experience, so you stay around situations where you don’t feel you really fit.

So how do you get beyond the belief you’re better off alone?

You do so by dealing with the fear of potential domination, the times in the past when you have felt rejected for not wanting to be compliant; the times you have felt hurt that your individuality hasn’t been noticed, let alone accepted.

So how do you really fit?

The key is to accept some people only feel safe around those they can rule over.

What I got sucked into for a long time was thinking I had to fit in, and be ruled over

You end up feeling you’re always trying to escape.

That doesn’t work, because those who would happily include you think you don’t want to be there.

So what are 3 little things you can do to feel you can choose where you fit?

  1. Accept some people don’t expect anything from you. There are people who genuinely like you and expect nothing.
  2. Accept those who dominate are ruled by their insecurity. You assume those who dominate know more than you. They don’t: they operate from fear.
  3. Spot what’s triggered your aloofness. Because the more you do this, the quicker you’ll find where you fit.
Where would you like to discuss the Article with me?
Part 2:
Accompanying Meditation

Resolving Rejection Meditation

Give the Soul Directed Relationships Meditation a go, even if you’ve never done meditation before – just follow the words.

Complete The Meditation Now
Resolving Rejection Meditation
Part 2:
Accompanying Episode

Resolving Rejection Meditation

You’re better off working on your own - right? You believe the only person you can trust is yourself. You’re suspicious of offers of help and prefer to be the super-helpful person. But, at the same time, you would love for someone to notice your needs, to notice what you need without your having to spell it out. The question is why is it you can spot what someone else needs but no one can spot it for you?

Watch The Episode Now
Resolving Rejection Meditation
Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Orphan Archetype Workshop

When the Orphan energy is active, you wait for the rescue that never happened, you feel lost, don’t know where you fit in, you settle for less than you want and you desperately want to go ‘home’ but you don’t know where home is.

The Orphan energy chooses you to create the ultimate rescue, the connection to the self, beyond self-abandonment and into interdependence, the safe, secure world of true self-esteem and value.

Part 2:
Ready for the next step?

Turn your sensitivity into your greatest asset.

What's coming next might just be the magical missing piece you've been searching for... (No crystal ball required, though they are pretty :) 

Every year since 2011, I've guided thousands of Intuitive-Sensitives through understanding and working with the unique energy patterns of each New Year. These transformative workshops combine ancient wisdom with contemporary neuroscience, helping soul seekers navigate their path with greater confidence and clarity.

Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Untangling Love’s Web: From Control to Connection

In this content-packed, free On-Demand Workshop, you will learn:

  • How to heal your "Projective Love Story" (idealised relationship fantasy) and stop control, dominance, and projection from ruling your relationships
  • Why spotting the "dominator" (control-driven behaviour) in yourself and others is key to breaking free from controlling dynamics
  • Simple ways to remove the dominator within and create healthy, respectful relationships based on mutual trust and understanding
Part 2:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Breaking the Hero Fantasy: Empowering Your Inner Self

In this content-packed, free On-Demand Workshop, you will learn:

  • How to heal from neurotic love and the rescuing patterns that stop you from achieving true connection
  • Why understanding infantile relatedness is the key to breaking free from unfulfilling relationships
  • How your subconscious beliefs have kept you stuck in rescuing dynamics—and what to do about it
Part 2:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Navigating the Emotional Abyss: Finding Stability Within

In this content-packed, free On-Demand Workshop, you will learn:

  • How to find stability and calm in the "Emotional Abyss" (feeling overwhelmed by emotions) by creating a strong emotional foundation
  • Why it’s important to reconnect with your inner self to stop emotional chaos from controlling your life
  • Simple, practical steps to build emotional resilience and regain control, so you can create healthy, lasting relationships

Even if you’ve been feeling lost or overwhelmed by your emotions, this workshop will guide you to a place of emotional stability and strength.

Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Magician Archetype Workshop

When the Magician energy is active, you have the ability to transform reality. It’s as though a magnetic field draws you to experiences that match your inner reality.

The Magician energy chooses you to connect with your healing potential and give you access to the unconscious world of wonderment, charm and the deeply connected spiritual self.

Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Lover Archetype Workshop

When the Lover energy is active, your soul is at odds with your careful ego. You live a life switching between conquering fear, taking risks and the excitement of your consciousness expanding, followed by flopping back into the safety of what you know.

The Lover energy chooses you to connect with your personal source of power that’s not a climb for position or authority, not a power over another but real power - the power within.

Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

King Archetype Workshop

When the King energy is active, your inner world is conflicted. Each time you step into your own rules, you hear the voice of the King’s shadow – the tyrant suggesting you are less than, how you’ll never live up to expectations and the weakling ‘prince’ who doesn’t protect your new path.

The solution is to step into the energy of the true King, the matured ‘male’ energy offering centred, confident direction from deep within. The unconscious pressure to ‘fit in’ evaporates as you step into your own leadership. .

Part 3:
Are you ready to go deeper?

Get FREE Access Now To The

Queen Archetype Workshop

You’ve looked around, decided what you like, made judgements and now you’re going out on your own. Does what you want match with others or should you just become what you think they want?

This stage is answered through the process of Creating Your Own Values, by using your Queen Energy.

About Heidi Sawyer

If you are frustrated because you keep attracting difficult people into your life, the Love YOUR Life show will help. Fans of the show are ecstatic about the fun and entertaining way Heidi Sawyer brings you practical advice to help you recognise unhealthy dynamics and get your life back on track after being affected by controlling relationship(s).

Love Your Life Show

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